So once upon a time I dated the “hot” girl at work that had a couple of kids. Going into this relationship I was the typical young dumb 20 something that didn’t think about the commitment that went into dating someone with children. Here are a few things that may help you if you’re considering dating someone who comes with a few extra human beings.
The first thing I learned was that no matter what happens for the most part your always second. Kids take up a lot of a parents time and they usually come first. If you can’t deal with dropping kids off at school and making sure there is always a baby sitter then dating somebody with kids is not for you. You need to realize going into this relationship that these kids mean the world to this person you and they need care all the time. So you are an important person in their life you just aren’t thee most important.
From the first lesson you can learn the second thing I found out quick, you aren’t going to go out often. When I dated this person I was around 22 so prime drinking age. I would want to go to the bars or out partying with my friends and she wanted to stay home. What I didn’t at the time was she had a job to do as a mother and going out all the time didn’t fit into that. So if you are cool with Netflix and chilling at home a majority of the time you could withstand this relationship.
Another thing that is important that you need to talk about is how the kids will view you? Are you the new mommy or daddy? Or just Frank mommy’s friend? This also involves if you are going to discipline the kids at all. This is something that people can go either way on. Don’t hit my kid, don’t yell at them, and so on. What I ended up being was mommy’s boy friend and the adult in the situation so it was agreed upon that I would correct them if I saw them doing something that wasn’t right. I think this would have been a good situation if we kept going because the kids did have their own father and I wasn’t there to replace him.
One of the last things you should know about being in a relationship with someone with kids issss…. the kids will grow on your and if you break up with this person your breaking up with them too. We all know we don’t go into something hoping for it to fail but in the case of breaking a kids heart you need to think about all the outcomes. My exes kids end up messaging me here and there but for the most part I think I was the one that lost my little friends.
So that’s it for this post so I don’t end up rambling on about an ex lover. I would like to thank all the people who started following the blog and urge everyone to share with your friends.
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